Second Key – Taking Intentional Time

Last week I talked about dealing with life transitions.  Through my life experiences I have come up with three key strategies for coping with these transitions.  Last week I talked a lot about the first key which is actually acknowledging that something has occurred that has made a huge change in your life.  Once you have acknowledged that fact then you can do something about it.

That brings us to the second key – intentionally taking time to deal with whatever has happened.  For me, that was about a half hour every morning after the kids had gone to school.  I found a book that really spoke to me and read a chapter each morning.  It wasn’t even a book on grief! 

At the end of each chapter was an exercise or meditation to do, which I did.  I usually ended by writing a poem about the exercise.  Often tears flowed the whole time. 

This writing was a real outlet for me as well.  I discovered that almost always I started with the pain and sadness and ended with a feeling of Universal LOVE. 

When I took time to intentionally think about my grief, I could make it through the day without any more tears.  When I didn’t, I found that I would burst into tears at the silliest little thing – seeing someone walking their dog, standing in line at the grocery store, whenever someone gave me their condolences…..

Over the years I learned other ways of intentionally dealing with my pain and sadness.   Some of these included colouring my pain, lighting candles to say good-bye, writing a letter to my loved one and more.  Sometimes simply sitting and feeling the pain as I thought about what had happened and letting the tears flow was all I could do.

We all need to find what works for us.  What works often changes too.  What worked one week or month might not work the next month and we need to try something different.  The key is to keep taking time to intentionally think about, and so deal with, whatever has happened. 

Next week I’ll tell you about the third key strategy.  Stay tuned.

If you’d like to learn more, please join me on Thursday, March 12 from 10-4 for my class “3 Keys to Dealing With Life Transitions” at the QVCA in Fort Qu’Appelle.  If you don’t live close enough but would like to attend this class, let me know.  I’d love to travel with it so maybe we could set up something in your community. 

I would be interested in hearing about your experience in dealing with your own life transitions.  How did you cope?  What did you discover?

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